Sabriel (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
bindsthedead) wrote2021-06-30 01:12 pm
bindsthedead) wrote2021-06-30 01:12 pmEntry tags:
Ximilia inbox
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TEXT • AUDIO • VIDEO
XIMILIA
bindsthedead) wrote2021-06-30 01:12 pm
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[There is a long, long pause before Sabriel speaks. When she does, it's slowly, reluctantly, like every word is being dragged from her throat, and occasionally, her voice grows tight, like she's about to start crying.]
I died, before my arrival here. I was impaled through the stomach with my own sword.
I was tired, I wanted to pass, but- My father, and all my predecessors, told me I wasn't allowed to. Not until I had someone to replace me as Abhorsen.
So they made me go back.
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Jesus christ.
Is this even worth it? It's not worth it, right? Sure, Ziggy, it's not like a dozen dead children and many killed in the past aren't relying on you to get these orbs' powers; it's totally not like you and your sister's lives depend on this. It's not like fixing things will completely repair the damage done to your cursed town where everyone suffers from the worst luck.]
So they... forced you to stay alive?
They could just — do that? Even when you were dead?
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[It's not something Sabriel fully understands- they'd been luminous, like the mother-sending (Or had that really been a Sending? Or something else, called from a ritual and a drop of blood?)]
There are some aspects of magic and Death the living aren't meant to know. I suspect it was one of those things.
[Sabriel just sounds.... Tired. And sad. Because thinking of that battle makes her recall everyone else who died that day. Soldiers and schoolgirls who weren't important enough to be brought back to life.]
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But... You're glad for it now, right? That they brought you back?
They did it for the wrong reasons, but you're at least here.
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Even in death, they were Abhorsens. And I wouldn't describe their reasons as wrong... the work we do is necessary.
But... My friends, classmates... Many of them died that night as well. That's why I made my bargain with the orb.
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You want to bring your friends and classmates back.
[She fidgets uncomfortably, eyes downcast.]
That's what I'm trying to do, too. I want to save my sister, but — there are a lot of kids who died the night we did.
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[Sabriel smiles- faintly, sadly, as memories of her classmates come rushing back.]
That's an understandable regret to have. Death is inevitable, but... sometimes, it's unfair.
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If death always has to happen exactly how it should, why would there be ways to avoid it? To undo it? You'd think if it were really something you have to accept, you wouldn't be able to be here.